Three of the most important conversations by Citrus

From Citrus' myspace blog

I had three of the most important conversations in my life this week.

I am still reeling from it all really. HEAVY STUFF for me.
First got with my Tia Margaret...we Finally got to share some perspective on Life together after some 31 yrs apart....I got some good information from her and a LOT of LOVE. I realized that the LOVE truly was always present...and tho the dam was holding it back...the floodgates are wide open at the moment and the river of life is moving fast...cleaning and churning....stagnant no more.

Being alone with her was amazing. That conversation led me to the next two because it came to light that my sisters weren't talking to each other and why....

So...Next up....Sister Kim....numba ONE.
Yes...she is the oldest of my three sisters..and the one that I know the least.

We FINALLY got to be alone...the FIRST TIME IN OUR LIVES!!!!
I dunno how to describe the emotions that went thru me...I think Every emotion you could have passed thru my being on that day. Quickly...over the course of a couple of hours we tried to catch up...to express ourselves and our perspectives on the mess that is our Family..to show how much we love each other...Mostly we realized that we were played against each other.. we knew it all along...but we made it REAL that day...and vowed to NOT ALLOW it any longer. We are grown folk now and will just have to take the reigns and show our elders about a little thing called the TRUTH...because it will certainly set us all free. My poor sister...she has suffered enough and plenty...perhaps more than I can even imagine. We did after all only get thru a couple of tough layers to this onion.

Next up...Baby Sista...who is NO baby... Krista..
We went to breakfast with our Auntie and Uncle then over to their house to look at pictures. Margaret is pretty damn sick(see previous blog Orando por mi tia) and is obviously preparing herself mentally for her bodies' eventual end. I got a good amount of pictures of my cousins and uncles and aunts and dad and step mom and sisters and grandparents and such....pictures from different phases of their lives that I missed out on...some from the way back machine...the faces that I remember.
THEN...we went for a little walk...Just me and Krista also for the FIRST time we were alone together....and WE tried to catch up. We learned a LOT about each other. Even MORE stuff came up and out....cuz I had more information at this point...and could suss some things out better.
I realized that tho I had the pain and agony of being ripped from my family...my sisters suffered more than I did. Their life stories sound like a hell that I am very lucky to have escaped. We all longed for each other equally and were equally confused and hurt by the whole thing. I see that we are all cut off from our emotions (nobody cried). We learned a lot of the same stuff...I saw myself in them for the FIRST time. Yes...tho they say that they are polar opposites..my sisters are very much alike..and I am like THEM.


WE all got an honest look into the mirror this week. The ramifications are yet to be felt...and there are two or three more conversations that MUST be had...the THREE of us together...and One on ONE with Pops...
None of us and All of us are to blame...and there will have to be discussions with everybody really. They should be much easier that these first 5 or so...

NONE of this would be going down without Myspace and my cousin Rachel. The ONLY one to take a step towards ME.

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Flashes of Wonderful by Citrus

From Citrus' myspace blog

I know I have been on the low end of the wave for the last few weeks.

Feeling used up and old....like the water is flowing too fast for me to swim against. It has been some strange dayz for me lately to be sure.


Last night tho...I was blessed....and it really snapped me out of it!




I was really bummed at the start of this session because I had worked really hard on creating some Hindustani classes because I had several requests to do them at Swallow Hill. Nobdody signed up...well one guy did, but the classes fell thru.
I wanted to show beginners the Carnatic system of scale exercises that I learned at Dr. Suma Sudhindra's school in Bangalore back in the early 90s.

I have been teaching that system for the last week or so ANYWAY in ALL of my classes...because it is just so useful and I love to see people who were confused and not free to play open up and understand really big concepts from the start! It isn't a part of the curriculum and I certainly didn't PLAN on teaching this to ALL of my students. IT just WORKS.



So last night I was teaching my guitar logic class and was helping them thru the exercises in different positions and fingerings across the CAGED system. I noticed that the amplifier that the younger student was playing thru had a sticker on it that said "Goddess". I dunno..it was sparkly and caught my eye. I thought for a moment that my two students truly were goddesses and that I was lucky to have them in my life.
One is the student that has RA and has been helping me face that stuff..the other...the young student...she has taken SEVERAL of my group class offerings and tho she struggles to keep up, she works hard and tries hard and when she let's go I hear things that really amaze me come out of her fingers...she usually notices me noticing and then freezes...but hey...that flash of wonderful is really what it is ALL about!

So anyway...just seconds after this flash on the Goddess...we stop playin and the young lady says to me in a very serious tone..

"Goddess Saraswati is surely proud of you!"

This young thing....all blond and blue and emo...not outwardly showing ANY signs of knowing ANYTHING about Hinduism....SHE lays THAT on me!

A blessing...that the Goddess of Music and Knowledge and the Arts is smiling on ME!!??

I instantly felt a wash of cleansing and happiness...of a bit of guilt for my lack of
faith and for judging people.....and of immense vindication...that I am doing what I am supposed to do.
I saw myself as Shiva....teaching Saraswati herself about music.
Suddenly EVERYTHING was perfect! The water was still and refreshing, cleansing and wonderful

of course, that flash is now gone.... but that flash of wonderful is really what it is ALL about!

Purple Rain @ Red Rocks FRI, AUG 8!

YES...we are very excited and preparing diligently for this upcoming show on Friday. Click on the flyer for more info!

U.S. Pipe in today's Denver Post

http://www.denverpost.com/headlines/ci_10047538

"U.S. Pipe, one of Denver's busiest funk bands, will end a short tour of the state with a Red Rocks stop on Aug. 8, at which the band will play (wait for it . . .) "Purple Rain" in its entirety. Before then, however, it will hit Avon, Aspen, Breckenrige, Fort Collins and many points in between. Check us-pipe.com for more information and ticket prices. "

--John Wenzel

THANK YOU, John Wenzel + Denver Post!