Over the Hills and Thru the Woods to Funk YOU UP! by Citrus

From Citrus' myspace blog

We almost didn't GO! The show Yesterday was a Blizzast! An epic adventure in the name of Funk!

Due to several reasons...Azma not being able to make it for a VERY SPECIAL reason, Not having a 4 wheel drive vehicle to drive a couple folks up, the INCREDIBLE blizzard that had most of the roads CLOSED, we ALMOST didn't even bother going up the hill!



Xmas Day was spent in speculation and wonder..fear was growing in the ranks. We had realized that we didn't have a 4X4 reserved about a week back and tried in vain to get one. The news and online tools all pointed to it being impossible to get to Telluride. A HUGE storm was passing thru..dumping 40 inches of snow on Telluride in 24 hours! I couldn't get thru to the club to find out what was going on and around 1 am I fell out...worried about the morning.


Popped up at about 7 and found that one road I was worried about was open according to the CDOT website. Yet the TV said that it was impossible to get to Telluride. I called the police up there and the officer told me that "If you aren't in Telluride NOW..you aren't getting to Telluride today!" So I left a message with the club that we weren't going to head up. Sent out the word to the band and went about relaxing.....about an hour later that all changed!

Got a call from Tom at the Club finally! He said that we could make it...Oh lord...I called the cops again...different officer...."if you can get to Grand Junction you can get here!!" Well....I-70 was open all the way!
Took about another hour to finally re-assemble the troops. Another couple hours to get out to the Airport to pick up the vehicle and back and get loaded up and all...buying tire chains along the way home. We were OFF..

The ride was breezy till we got to Vail Pass...that's when we had our first "oh hell" moment. A huge chunk of snow hit the windshield..like 4 inches deep...sliding off the mountain in front of me in a mini avalanche. Took my feet up off the pedals and relaxed. Kept on keepin on and it was really no problem till we got past Glenwood Springs...that's when everything changed!
It was getting dark..the snow was THICK and blowing all over the place. My fellow travellers on the road were mainly a bunch of wimps tho. I would try to conform and sit in line with them..but found that following an idiot that slams on their breaks at every curve was much more dangerous than riding in the other lane with nobody in front of me. I LOVE driving in the snow...and I got my fill of it! The conditions were about as bad as I had ever driven in till we got to Grand Junction...At one point Tom called me..."hows it going?" he asked...."Much better than it is for the truck that just flipped into the ditch in front of me bro" was my reply. I counted at least 5 wrecks in that stretch of highway...with a jack-knifed tractor-trailer being one of them on an off ramp. There were times that I had to imagine I was a goalie in Hockey...keeping track of the sides of the roads cuz I couldn't really see in front of me at all.
Then it was like there was NO snow at all..not even on the ground..a Big patch of clean easy driving...I thanked the heavens for the break. As soon as we headed south it was clear! For a while. After a bit the snow came back...hard and heavy. My biggest problem now tho was the fools with their brights on illuminating the storm and not the roads..the jerks who flashed their lights at me cuz they didn't see me turn off my brights...

One of the HIGHLIGHTS of the trip was calling KURT and asking for Directions! Thank GOD somebody bought him a GPS for Xmas!

At long last we arrived safe and sound! Sent Missy and Mike to deal with the Hotel and the rest of us Loaded in..set up and got HIGH as a kite!


Now the show....The show was one of the best shows musically that we have put on in a LONG time. We started off with Music For My Mother and mugs were dancing like freaks from the TOP! We had all decided to stretch things and experiment a bit. It paid off.
I was really loving my set up of amps for the evening. The old Twin (that is now dubbed 7 but pronounced Seb'n) and the Boogie blended with the stereo delay sounded like they were made for each other! Izabella came thru and sent me into a sexual frenzy that I hadn't experienced in decades! I was fuckin her good all over the place...grinding the frets on my amp...droppin her on the gound and makin her rumble...calling down the thunder by scratching the springs in the back...most of the old tricks from my Jimi and Stevie worshipping daze. She held her tuning pretty well and maintained playability thru the night...She's BACK for real now! Plus I know I can put her thru the ropes and have a great place to take her to for tender love and care!

With Tear the Roof we hit the nail on the head baby... had the crowd in our hands...they kept the chant going and going....and we would drop out and let them take charge...THIS is the FIRST Time that we ever got our audience to that point...that point in a show where the band becomes secondary and the crowd takes over. It didn't stop there.

Kurt and Murphy dropped into a pocket while I tuned up that had every lady in front of me wet and all the dudes boned up....I joined in and they tried to stop, but I couldn't let those people down like that till they got a nut! We kept the jam going and it ended up being a real highlight of the evening...the horns hit some great lines they had been working on and I sang the Cajun Stripper Queen over it cuz it had that Dirty sexy Big Easy vibe on it.

Maggott Brain...oh hell...I told the crowd to start makin out and to get out their lighters...they did..it was beautiful!
I was bending that Strat's strings farther than I have since the early 90s...she was on fire...FINALLY I broke one..the b string snapped under the tension...."What would Mike do?" I went apeshit on the high e string...moving to the g occasionally but over all I just played a few more minutes on one string...getting the melody to come thru as well. We even managed to pull off the heavy ending...

There were TONS of great moments... a few "ass-pie" moments. But basically we did great..
Missy really shone thru ! We mapped out a few things on the ride up and it paid off big time. Her voice was strong all night and we had some really good blends! She was confident and sure of herself all night long! It was a pleasure to behold!
The Horns were horny and groovin......a lot of good stuff was coming thru and they sounded tight as could be. I loved it seeing the charts fall to the ground in a pile! We don't need to stinkin charts! Mike and Jimmy both had some major solo's...at one point in the night there was a crowd of mugs just eggin them on...eating up every note! tha bomb! We did a lot of give and take and took each other into different phrasing and note combos...how fun!

Kurt slammed some major shit Solo'd his ass off and really held things down...we had some great improvisational moments too
The Lock Brothers? the three of us were locked tight as our sphincters were on the ride up! LOL.
Murpholoptic? SHEEEITTT>..he drove the whole way and played a killer show...In fact...while we were just setting up and getting ready to start soundcheck..he hit just a couple of notes on the drums and it made the kundalini shoot up my spine! The rest of the night was no different. His vocals were killer too...Soldier.

Everybody was on point..their ears were open...their eyes were communicating! We were a unit again!

We missed Azma big time..in fact we dedicated the show to him and his son. I think that in a way we were playin FOR them and their big chance to be together...sending love from afar.

For me personally it was a victory....I was deeply saddened by the thoughts of not going to the show...the debates and the obstacles thrown in my way made me question my Self and a lot of other things. I thought "what would my heroes do?" they would be at the road block waiting for them to open the gates so they could play the gig...they would play Maggott Brain on one string...they would let the audience dictate the momentum of the show...they would soldier on and do the damn thing...




Well...now my band is my hero.